Children in worship

Children belong in the worship service and they can be full participants in the experience. While there are some legitimate pragmatic reasons why some churches take children out of the corporate worship service, there are no legitimate developmental or theological reasons to do so. Often, the problem with children in worship is two-fold: (1) a lack of a “theology of children” on the part of the congregation and its leaders, and, (2) a lack of accomodation of the needs of children in worship. Focusing on getting clarity on those two points will go a long way to helping a congregation do good work of the spiritual formation of their children. Continue reading

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Ministering from the right side of the brain

I’ve been a lifelong doodler. In fact, my college notes look more like sketchbooks than notebooks (and the doodles are the only reason I’ve kept some of my college notes). Even today pencil and paper aren’t far from reach in the event an idle moment provides opportunity to doodle.

At times doodles have turned into sketches, and sketches into drawings. The graphite drawing below, done several years ago, started as a doodle which eventually became a favorite rendering, which today hangs framed in my study. Continue reading

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Ministry years

Recently someone started a conversation with me by saying, “You were right.”

“What about?” I asked.

He explained that he was having a real tough year in ministry. He was experiencing a lot of frustration and restlessness, with periods of ennui and what felt at times like depression. Often, he said, he felt suffocated in his work. Then, during one day of introspection he realized that this was his fourth year in this ministry setting, and he remembered my presentation on the “Ministry Years.”

“I really didn’t believe you when I heard you say that the fourth year was always the year of discontent,” he said, “but you were right. That’s exactly where I am.” Continue reading

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“The Rules”

Attached is the article notes of a recent presentation titled “The Rules.” The article highlights fifteen “rules” about leadership in the congregational setting. These “derivative rules” are informed by Bowen Family Systems Theory.

You can download the article here: galindotherules.pdf (.pdf, 9 pages).

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On metaphors, analogies, and rigid thinking

Three recent conversations reminded me of the importance of moving away from ways of thinking that lead us toward “naïve understanding” and of the necessity of working toward a more critical way of thinking about matters of importance. In one instance, a person seemed to have gotten stuck in a loop she could not get out of in dealing with an issue because she could not move beyond saying, “But the Bible says…” In another, a minister was trying to explain the need to address certain dynamics by using the analogy of a bus. Specifically, he tried to explain the necessity of getting the right dynamic on the right seat on the bus—in this case, “in the driver’s seat.” The third conversation was with a layperson that is having a difficult time with a congregational crisis. She would say over and again, “We’re supposed to be a family. How people act this way?” Continue reading

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Teaching children the Bible

When I was an elementary school principal at a Christian school parents would often ask about the reason for why we required the children to memorize Bible verses (by fourth grade they were memorizing whole chapters as well as a repertoire of classical poetry). Actually, they weren’t really asking for an educational rationale as much as mildly expressing their frustration at having to spend time at home helping their children memorize the verses (and triangulating me in on their anxious relationship with the kid’s teacher). This may seem strange coming from parents who chose intentionally to send their children to a Christian school but for two things. First, adults tend to develop amnesia about children’s cognition and their experience of the world. When that cognitive shift in the brain happens sometime during adolescent, most adults lose the capacity to “think like a child” (thank goodness), but also to lose the capacity to appreciate how a child thinks and learns. Second, tragically, schools and churches often are delegated responsibilities for educating children in both culture and faith from parents too lazy, too busy, too reluctant, or too irresponsible for taking the responsibility that rightly belongs to them as parents.

My response to those parents usually included comments about the facility children have to memorize, and the necessity for insisting that they do. Nancy Ammerman has a great article in the current issue of The Christian Century titled “Memory Verses: Teaching Children the Bible.” She provides a good corrective to liberal and moderate-minded Christian educators who tend to shy away from pedagogy they regrettably have allowed more conservative Christian educators to co-opt for all the wrong reasons. Well worth the read, and well worth “taking to heart.”

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Shameless self-promotion

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An article by Israel Galindo appears in the current issue of Congregations magazine from Alban Institute. The article is titled “What’s Systems Theory Got to Do with It?: Addressing Congregations’ Emotional Processs in Our Preaching.” In it, Galindo says, “The sermon is as much about the preacher, the congregation, and their relationship in the context of being church as it is about the text.”

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Suggestions for children’s sermons

I recently visited a church in which a staff member did the “children’s sermon” during the morning worship service. It was all I could do to keep from moaning and cringing. This staff member broke all of the “rules” for delivering a children’s sermon. I’ll spare you the gruesome and unfortunate details of the performance, suffice it to say it was one of the best examples I’ve seen of the worst way to do it.

I’m not quite sure about what makes children’s sermons such a universally bad practice in congregations. I suspect a lot of it has to do with two things: (1) a lack of understanding of the developmental characteristics of children, and (2) a lack of a clearly articulated theology of children in the church. A little effort in those two areas can go a long way in helping church leaders and members be more effective in the way they minister to, and with, the children in their congregation.

Here are the suggestions I share with pastors about how to deliver a children’s sermon. There are other concepts and points that can be made, but these address the more egregious sins committed in this regard: Continue reading

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Teaching the unteachable

Sometimes I get the nagging suspicion that there may be some things that are “unteachable.” Ironically, those things may be the most important things we want to teach, things like maturity, emotional intelligence, faith, and the usable part of systems theory—that part which we are able to actually live and apply and not merely “know something about.”

There are two educational thoughts that challenge my occasional suspicion. Those are: (1) you can teach anybody anything in twenty minutes, and (2) “any subject could be taught to any child at any age in some form that is honest.” (Bruner, pp. ix, 33, 47) While number one may not be provable, the second has the weight of research and evidence behind it. Continue reading

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First Second chair post

Interestingly enough, we’ve yet to have a “second chair” post on the blog. This is interesting in that most of us in the GRACE group fall under that category. Whether you are a second chair or first chair in your current ministry position it may be worth working through this informal and unscientific quiz. posted on Todd Rhode’s blog, Monday Morning Insight.

Take the quiz for youself as a checkup. Take it with your fellow staff members to open up some honest sharing. If you’re a first chair lead your staff to take it together, and you go first in sharing the results (after all, going first is what leadership is all about, isn’t it?).

We all know that one can be lonely in a crowd. And too often, things are even lonelier in a ministry staff setting when our relationship with colleagues is superficial, distant, and lacks honesty and collegiality.

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