Book review: Thompson, Family: The Forming Center

The central thesis of Marjorie J Thompson’s Family: The Forming Center. A vision of the role of family in spiritual formation (Nashville: Upper Room Books, 1996), is that, for good or evil, the home is the primary context in which spiritual formation takes place. Spiritual formation can take place through intentional teaching and practices, or it can take place through modeling and unconscious attitudes, but it will take place. Spiritual formation is likely the most foundational formation that takes place in a child’s early life, overlapping with mental, physical and ethical formation. The question for parents is what kind of formation is taking place? The answer for Christian families is that they should be formed to the image of Christ and not the world.

Families face many challenges in today’s society. First there are the obvious attacks from illegal drugs, alcohol abuse, teenage pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. Then there are the not so obvious attacks from materialism and capitalism which seduces parents into focusing more of their time, energies and intellect on earning more money and power than on their families. Families that want to intentionally help their children mature in Christian spirituality need to re-focus their energies.

There is a long history in the Judeo-Christian tradition for the idea of religion practiced in the home – the domestic church. It is only relatively recently with a trend to compartmentalize our lives that the church has become the “sacred” space while everywhere else, including the home, is “secular”.

In this book, families are encouraged to practice core practices of the Christian faith in the home: prayer, scripture reading, rituals and symbols, storytelling and servant. They must establish a time to pray together regularly. Prayer time might also be a good time to read and discuss a scripture passage. Incorporating Biblical stories into play time might be a good way to break down the walls between sacred and secular. Families already practice ritual and symbols through the holidays that they celebrate. Small rituals should be expanded into the everyday life. And families must practice a servant attitude both within the home and outside.

Ms. Thompson writes with a knowledge that is firmly grounded in the realities of family life today. She states that the busy-ness of families need not interfere with intentional spiritual formation. Many of her suggestions, such as a 5 minute scripture reading before bedtime, take little time. Other suggestions, such as practicing the presence of God, take no time at all, but are simply a focusing of our attention on what is important in our lives.

The reader is also reminded that some spiritual formation already takes place unintentionally, such as having a significant conversation while washing dishes or commuting to school. Families just need to be aware of these opportunities and treasure their potential rather than rebelling against the confinement of the situation.

Ms. Thompson’s attention does not focus solely on the family, but also encompasses the greater church family. Churches today need to be more intentional about supporting and nurturing families. Churches cannot simply focus on “fixing” broken families, although this is a necessary activity. Churches must also work on supporting and edifying families not in immediate crisis. This may require a re-working of the educational curriculum or adding more workshops. At the very least, churches must learn to pay more attention to support of the domestic church.

This book is in a clear and easy to understand style. Families, church laypeople and clergy will find it a valuable resource for support of spiritual formation in the home.

Reviewed by: Sharon West, guest blogger